Family quotes

Discover heartwarming quotes and insightful words that celebrate the cherished bond of family on our quote website. Explore love, unity, and the power of togetherness through beautifully crafted phrases.

Use your head not just your spirit. Think think think.

- Tanjiro Kamado

When you have children, you always have family. They will always be your priority, your responsibility. And a man, a man provides. And he does it even when he's not appreciated or respected or even loved. He simply bears up and he does it. Because he's a man.

- Chloe Decker

Do you have any history of mental illness in your family? I have an uncle who does yoga.

- Ron Swanson

This is not a normal family.

- Joyce Byers

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.

- Erma Bombeck

Sometimes I can’t figure designers out. It’s as if they flunked human anatomy.

- Erma Bombeck

Skiing? I do not participate in any sport that has ambulances at the bottom of the hill.

- Erma Bombeck

Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.

- Erma Bombeck

One thing they never tell you about child-raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.

- Erma Bombeck

Next to a hot chicken soup, a tattoo of an anchor on your chest, and penicillin, I consider a honeymoon one of the most overrated events in the world.

- Erma Bombeck

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

- Erma Bombeck

My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?

- Erma Bombeck

Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.

- Erma Bombeck

It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.

- Erma Bombeck

Insanity is hereditary. You can catch it from your kids.

- Erma Bombeck

If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.

- Erma Bombeck

If God had meant us to walk around naked, he would never have invented the wicker chair.

- Erma Bombeck

I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along.

- Erma Bombeck

I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

- Erma Bombeck

Housework can kill you if done right.

- Erma Bombeck

He who laughs… lasts.

- Erma Bombeck

Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen? Three. It takes one to say, What light? and two more to say, I didn’t turn it on.

- Erma Bombeck

Dreams have only one owner at a time. That’s why dreamers are lonely.

- Erma Bombeck

Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.

- Erma Bombeck

Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.

- Erma Bombeck

Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they’re not trying to keep up with you.

- Erma Bombeck

An advantage of having only one child is that you always know who did it.

- Erma Bombeck

A child needs your love most when he deserves it least.

- Erma Bombeck

You are either with us, or against us.

- George H. W. Bush

What's wrong with being a boring kind of guy?

- George H. W. Bush