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Author Novelist War Humor satirist

He was going to live forever, or die in the attempt.

- Joseph Heller

Other quotes by Joseph Heller


Success Man

He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

- Joseph Heller
Country

I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.

- Joseph Heller

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

- Joseph Heller
Injustice Destiny

Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.

- Joseph Heller

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you.

- Joseph Heller
Government

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.

- Joseph Heller

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When thought becomes excessively painful, action is the finest remedy.

- Salman Rushdie

All parents should be aware that when they mock or curse gay people, they may be mocking or cursing their own child.

- Anna Quindlen

There is as much difference between the counsel that a friend giveth, and that a man giveth himself, as there is between the counsel of a friend and of a flatterer. For there is no such flatterer as is a man's self.

- Francis Bacon

When I went off to the army when I was 17 years old, I believed in America and the rights of freedom. But today I believe my government is lying to the American people and that my president, George Bush, is a criminal.

- Jack Herer

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